Skip to main content

Breastfeeding sucks! Things that nobody will tell you until you experience it!


Our baby girl aka Milk Vampire is one month and one day old today , and her mama (me) turned into a walking vending machine!

After another 6 hours ( on and off ) marathon feeding I take a big breath and I sigh "thank God is finally over", when she suddenly opens her big eyes in which I see milk madness!
 I can't imagine how there is anything left in my boobs for her to eat! But  I know, if I won't feed her in that very moment she will scream like a mad man! Or mad baby - to be more specific.

On a day like today I wish I could put her back into my womb! 
It's emotionally and physically draining, and I'm asking myself why I'm still doing it?
 Honestly I don't know.

She is natural. She can latch so easily and maybe that's what keep me going? 
Our little cobra :) She will shake her little head right and left in a short distance from my breast just to attack her prey ( my nipple ) by surprise.

If you're curious how strong that baby can suck, simply put the end of the vacuum cleaner to your nipple and turn it on. And leave it for an hour or 6!  LOL!

Sometimes I recall those times when I could use the bathroom freely, whenever I had a need, or I could take a shower without fear that the little vampire will wake up any minute. 
I used to eat every 3 hours. Now I eat when my "boss" allow me to do this. 
I used to dream big. Now I have just one dream and it's called hot meal.
I used to spend about 20 minutes on my make-up. Now I simply do not go out anywhere and my clothes are always stained with my own milk....

They say that breastfeeding is a beautiful bonding experience. Well...I'm not sure about that, and saying that I'm starting to question my maternal instinct. But the only instinct I have at the moment is a survival instinct. That's all I have left. ;)
 But they also say - nothing last forever , so I hope that someday she will feed shorter! 


PS: Do you have/had similar experience with your little one? Or maybe want to share your cracked/bleeding nipples story? Feel free to leave your comment below! 


Popular posts from this blog


Journey. That will be a title for the next year starting from today.

Last year I asked myself out loud "how my life can change in a year from today?" I was open to all possibilities and I'm still amazed by the result. I didn't blog so much but that's fine. I was more present on the Instagram shearing pieces of my life with my friends and creating memories for myself.
Impossible it nothing. I experienced it again. Still waiting for the results from college but I think I can say that I finished Fashion Styling with Designer course.
Tomorrow I'm starting an internship in Primark HQ Design Department.


Sunday, 8pm and I'm still catching up on my college homework. I had 3 weeks break for Xmas but didn't do much. Ups... My entire household was under flu quarantine, except myself :) I was doing as a nurse.
Bart says I had magical powers, that keeps germs and viruses away from me. But I claim, it is just the simple power of the mind! :D Every night I listen to some positive affirmations and I guess that does the trick. And I'm pretty sure that this year I'm going to win Euromillions because of that!

Till next Sunday! 
xoxo Mags


I still can't wrap my head around it! How the hell I became a full-time student?! I didn't plan it, that's for sure. But I got this idea, in the back of my head and then I sent an email, went for an interview and bum! I'm a Fashion Styling student :D

Let's go back to the day I went for another interview. It was a job interview for an office assistant after which I knew I don't want to spend my whole day in front of the desk, answering phones and dealing with complaints and queries. No! No! No! I felt it in every part of my body, I don't want to stay here. I don't wanna do what I was doing before either. I lost my enthusiasm although I was pretty sure that I'm going in the right direction.

I got an extra push from my career counselor and I sent an email to college with the question if I can still apply for this year although the course has started already. On the next day, I went for an interview, showed my artwork and became a Fashion student. I cri…